Yesterday I spent the day at the ranch with the cowboy. He gave me a tour of his "projects". I am not sure how he finds time to ranch or farm, he has a lifetime of things he wants to do in each of three or four outbuildings. He has accumulated them for 40+ years and put them aside for when there is TIME! It is almost as bad as my "want to finish" piles, and I am not trying to raise hay and cows!! -that's funny- He is talking of retiring. I am wondering about the process he plans on implementing, it will take major changes no matter what he plans on doing. I've been "retired" since 1994, granted it was not a planned retirement, it is not easy. Just learning that there is not a have to "something or other" waiting to pounce is hard. I think I am comfortably entrenched in the theory that if it is still there tomorrow, it can probably wait for another few days. If not, then somebody else was more worried about it than I was and they did it. I have always had the attitude that if it wasn't screaming or bleeding it probably was not THAT important anyway. Didn't always make me popular, but it works for me. I know how the cowboy can retire without ever leaving the ranch. If he just cleaned up his outbuildings and left the ranching to his daughter and her significant other he could retire in place (R.I.P.). To be R.I.P.'d is not a bad plan, then there is little agonizing withdrawal. I just realized..... being R.I.P.'d and ripped ARE NOT THE SAME, although the withdrawal can just as painful. Helping him retire is going to be a lot of work, we will see how this goes. An extended trip to the Northwest Territories might be a starting off place.
Today, I don't have to go to town. YEA!!!!! I am sitting here posting to my blog and not taking a much needed shower, not making sour dough bread (but getting high on the fumes), not running a vacuum after dust bunnies or anything else that is waiting for me to do. Think I am retired? I am getting giddy from fermenting dough fumes though. Later!!
Monday, August 04, 2008
Saturday, August 02, 2008
Hot !!
It is the dog days of summer and it's hot! It didn't cool off here the air conditioner is running, it is storming with lightning, thunder and rain. I have been knocked off line and the sun has gone away. The cool breeze that we usually get is non existent. I drove to Helena to get some cipro, I have a bladder infection. That is so much fun to get when it is hot.
Travel plans:
Alaska 5 Sept to 24 Sept
Oklahoma 28 Sept to October 12
It won't give me much time home, but it will be EXITING!!!
Oklahoma I've been to it is a pretty state in a Oklahoma way. It is flat, dry and buggy. I love bugs, so that is not a problem for me.
Alaska, now that is different. I have never been there, not for the want of going, but because it has always been put on the back burner. I've been told that it is an experience that one has to experience to appreciate. Travel logs and pictures don't do it justice, I'm told. Until they invent smell-a-vision I agree. To experience anywhere it must be breathed in. I've been promised that I will experience fishing on a body of water that sees few people. NOW that will be an experience, to not have many people is unusual. Shrimping is promised, fresh sea food and spectacular vistas. I am fairly well traveled and have see a lot, so I am anticipating an experience to dwarf all others. I will be taking my camera and will have enormous files of pictures if it a spectacular as promised. You will all have to visit my Facebook to see how it impresses me.
Oh, I've been promised cold. I guess that is Alaska in September. I will need to update my cold wardrobe. I don't wear a coat here in Montana most of the time, I do have one but don't wear it often. Footwear, I guess my tennie runners will not be sufficient I will have to invest in warmer footwear. I am already spending money in my mind. This is going to be one expensive shopping trip. Then I will come home and go to Oklahoma were the temperatures in October although chilly are above freezing. I have to pack two suitcases.
I have to go work this out. Later
Travel plans:
Alaska 5 Sept to 24 Sept
Oklahoma 28 Sept to October 12
It won't give me much time home, but it will be EXITING!!!
Oklahoma I've been to it is a pretty state in a Oklahoma way. It is flat, dry and buggy. I love bugs, so that is not a problem for me.
Alaska, now that is different. I have never been there, not for the want of going, but because it has always been put on the back burner. I've been told that it is an experience that one has to experience to appreciate. Travel logs and pictures don't do it justice, I'm told. Until they invent smell-a-vision I agree. To experience anywhere it must be breathed in. I've been promised that I will experience fishing on a body of water that sees few people. NOW that will be an experience, to not have many people is unusual. Shrimping is promised, fresh sea food and spectacular vistas. I am fairly well traveled and have see a lot, so I am anticipating an experience to dwarf all others. I will be taking my camera and will have enormous files of pictures if it a spectacular as promised. You will all have to visit my Facebook to see how it impresses me.
Oh, I've been promised cold. I guess that is Alaska in September. I will need to update my cold wardrobe. I don't wear a coat here in Montana most of the time, I do have one but don't wear it often. Footwear, I guess my tennie runners will not be sufficient I will have to invest in warmer footwear. I am already spending money in my mind. This is going to be one expensive shopping trip. Then I will come home and go to Oklahoma were the temperatures in October although chilly are above freezing. I have to pack two suitcases.
I have to go work this out. Later
Friday, August 01, 2008
A change
I guess you could say I am not a blogger. My last blog posting was three years ago, I am surprised that this page is still active. I will try again.
There have been changes in that time, most so big that my life and the lives that we touch every day are changed forever. The biggest change is that my husband of 37 years was diagnosed with cancer and after a battle that lasted a mere 16 months died. I won't go into the whole process but I will say my life has changed, some changes have been unpredictable. When he was first gone, I was not sure that I could survive alone. I had never been alone and it was so frightening that I was paralyzed with grief and fear. I could not conceive that I would ever be safe or happy again. I was becoming the whimpering, needy widow and it was scaring me. I am usually able to spring back from losses and move on. I am, after all, a realist.
I did things that were fulfilling for me at the time. Most of them were surrounding my family, that was a way to keep sameness alive. I did join a few self help bulletin boards that helped me get through the darkest days. Mostly by reading post by people who were in a lot of pain. That was a good thing to do, I could see where languishing in self gratifying pain would lead me. I decided that this is not the place I wanted to be and I started to look outward again.
I could not have envisioned the path I would take to get where I am now a year and half later. Looking back at my last posting, I was caught up in the growth issues of our county and volunteer services. It is still a big issue, it is the same as it was in 2005, only I am not part of the discussion on the same level as I was then. I am caught up in the growth issues of me.
I was told all of my life I was born an old woman. I am not going to die an old woman. I have said since coming through the veil of grief that last year was my "crazy" year. I am not so sure I am going to give up "crazy" so easily. I think I like "crazy".
I have tackled floor covering installation, plumbing and learned that I am not quite so helpless as I was told. I have traveled to Missouri this year and I am planning a trip by train to Oklahoma with my girlfriend. I am going to Alaska with my boyfriend. I am "crazy".
Boyfriend! At my age to have a boyfriend, now that is "crazy". He is different than my previous life's partner. With my husband, there was an easy understanding. We could finish each other's sentences. We knew what the other was thinking and why. With my boyfriend there is a different level of understanding and simpatico that is a little unnerving after only a few months. I am looking forward to the "rest of the story".
There have been changes in that time, most so big that my life and the lives that we touch every day are changed forever. The biggest change is that my husband of 37 years was diagnosed with cancer and after a battle that lasted a mere 16 months died. I won't go into the whole process but I will say my life has changed, some changes have been unpredictable. When he was first gone, I was not sure that I could survive alone. I had never been alone and it was so frightening that I was paralyzed with grief and fear. I could not conceive that I would ever be safe or happy again. I was becoming the whimpering, needy widow and it was scaring me. I am usually able to spring back from losses and move on. I am, after all, a realist.
I did things that were fulfilling for me at the time. Most of them were surrounding my family, that was a way to keep sameness alive. I did join a few self help bulletin boards that helped me get through the darkest days. Mostly by reading post by people who were in a lot of pain. That was a good thing to do, I could see where languishing in self gratifying pain would lead me. I decided that this is not the place I wanted to be and I started to look outward again.
I could not have envisioned the path I would take to get where I am now a year and half later. Looking back at my last posting, I was caught up in the growth issues of our county and volunteer services. It is still a big issue, it is the same as it was in 2005, only I am not part of the discussion on the same level as I was then. I am caught up in the growth issues of me.
I was told all of my life I was born an old woman. I am not going to die an old woman. I have said since coming through the veil of grief that last year was my "crazy" year. I am not so sure I am going to give up "crazy" so easily. I think I like "crazy".
I have tackled floor covering installation, plumbing and learned that I am not quite so helpless as I was told. I have traveled to Missouri this year and I am planning a trip by train to Oklahoma with my girlfriend. I am going to Alaska with my boyfriend. I am "crazy".
Boyfriend! At my age to have a boyfriend, now that is "crazy". He is different than my previous life's partner. With my husband, there was an easy understanding. We could finish each other's sentences. We knew what the other was thinking and why. With my boyfriend there is a different level of understanding and simpatico that is a little unnerving after only a few months. I am looking forward to the "rest of the story".
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
